Friday the 13th: Performance Overload
by Invader Johnny
Summary: Hollywood Arts is doing a performance on Friday night, the problem? It's on the unluckiest day of the year, everyone is waiting for the night to be over, that is of course everyone except Jade West, she's been having a great time… But all "good things" must come to an end… A Jori fic.


**_Friday the 13th: Performance Overload._**

 ** _Writer: Invader Johnny._**

 ** _Disclaimer: I don't own Victorious, the rights to the show belong to Dan Schneider and Nickelodeon._**

 ** _Plot: Hollywood Arts is doing a performance on Friday night, the problem? It's on the unluckiest day of the year, everyone is waiting for the night to be over, that is of course everyone except Jade West, she's been having a great time… But all "good things" must come to an end… A Jori fic._**

 ** _Author Notes: This idea was given to me by "Quitting Time" and I thought it was too funny to pass, so after some brainstorming, this was the result of what would be a memorable evening for everyone involved, most of all Jade who will never view her "favorite holiday" the same way again._**

 ** _Keep an eye out for several references from other Nick shows, heh._**

 ** _Nothing else to say here other than enjoy the MADNESS bellow._**

* * *

 ** _"NOOO! MY FACE! MY BEAUTIFUL FACE!"_**

 _"_ _I'd say that's quite an improvement."_ Jade thought amused, _"She's never looked better."_

 ** _"I CAN'T BE SEEN LIKE THIS!"_**

The Goth watched from her chair, snickering evilly as the banshee darted from the girls' bathroom, covering her nose in an attempt to conceal something _unwanted_. Needless to say; this resulted in the self-centered diva not paying attention where she was going, the result? She bumped into her crush.

"Hey! I'm running here! Why don't you …" Trina complained, only to stop mid-sentence, feeling somewhat embarrassed afterwards "Oh… Hi… Beck… My bad, I didn't see you there."

"No worries." He squeaked, mentally berating himself afterwards. _"Damn… I still sound like I swallowed a balloon."_

"What's wrong with your voice?"

"I got into a little incident." He replied evasively, clearing up his throat to make himself sound deeper "Listen, I'd love to stay and chat, but I'm kinda in a hurry and… **_WOAH!_** "

Too little too late did she realize her face was exposed.

 _"Oh, Chiz."_

It was no secret that Trina had a thing for Beck; especially since he and Jade finally broke up for good after one huge argument to end all arguments, she knew it was her chance and bowed to get his attention by any means necessary so he would realize that _they_ were meant to **_be_** , but _now_ that she had it, the older teen just wanted the Earth to swallow her whole.

"What is that on your nose?" Beck asked surprised, the high pitch taking the better of him "Is that a **_zit_**?"

 ** _"DON'T LOOK AT ME!"_** Trina bellowed dramatically before sprinting the opposite way, once more covering her face behind her hands. **_"WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME?! WHAT DID I EVER DO TO DESERVE THIS?!"_**

Beck blinked several times before finally deciding to go after the girl to apologize and _try_ to calm her down, something that was easier said than done, due in part to how melodramatic he knew his friend's sister could be as well as the _incident_ he refused to talk about earlier, which resulted in the young actor walking with much difficulty if not rather foolishly.

 _"This is going to take a while."_

While Beck was in deep thought, he failed to notice or rather _chose_ to ignore his ex-girlfriend was nearby, grinning from ear to ear, which could only mean one thing.

 _"She saw everything … Just my luck."_

 _"I love Friday the 13th."_ Jade thought ecstatically _"This is **my** Christmas."_

"Trina! Watch where you're going!" Someone shouts "You almost made me drop my coffee!"

Hearing that familiar voice, the thespian turned around, staring into the tired chocolate brown eyes of her girlfriend of three months; Tori Vega.

"Let me help you with that." Jade said, swiftly grabbing the coffee from the other girl's hand, taking a sip from it. " _Umm_ , black with two sugars… You picked up some of my taste for coffee, Tor."

"I was on auto pilot." Tori admitted. "Felt like I needed _something_ to calm my nerves, next thing I know, I've a cup of joe, even ordered your favorite."

"Which is much appreciated." Jade replied, taking another sip. "But how many times do I have to tell you that there's ** _nothing_** to worry about? You're going blow everyone away tonight."

"That's sweet of you to say, baby."

"You know I don't give compliments too often." She shrugged "So **_don't_** get used to it."

"I won't…." Tori grinned widely "I rather like when you give them _rarely_ , makes it all the more… _Special_."

"Be a dork on your own time Vega." Jade rolled her eyes. "Now, need I remind you this **_isn't_** the first time you been on stage in front of a cheering crowd? What makes this time so different?"

"Because it's the very first time that I'm part of a show _my girlfriend_ put together!" Tori shot back. "You worked on it for who knows how long and the last thing I want is to somehow screw things up for you, baby."

"If you do, then you get a free pass… From me at least."

"That makes me feel _sooooo_ much better." She replied sarcastically. "New subject, **_please!_** _"_

"All right." Jade shrugged, taking another sip. "That's what you're wearing for tonight?"

"I said **_new_** subject!" Tori whined, taking a deep breath afterwards. "So, um… I see you're in a good mood."

"Oh, I am Vega, I am."

"That's what worries me." The Latina said crossing her arms, "Only two things in this world give you any sort of happiness and I'm one of them! The other is **_pain_** , be it the kind you get or the kind _other people_ go through, and since you're not wearing those boots you love to use to _punish_ your feet with … Dare I ask what poor unsuspecting soul is responsible for your sunny disposition?"

Even though she didn't show it, Jade was impressed; after all, not even **_Beck_ **noticed this much about her in the two years they had been going out while Tori who she had been dating for only a few months, _did_ … That said quite a lot about her girlfriend as far as the thespian was concerned.

"Well aren't you the observant one Sherlock?" The Goth teased "Fine, you caught me."

 ** _"I KNEW IT!"_** … Jade, what did you do?"

"Who? Me? Absolutely nothing." The Goth replied innocently "The _universe_ on the other hand? That's a completely different story."

"You're really not going to tell me?"

"Not unless you want to get a migraine before tonight's show."

"Ugh, you _had_ to bring that up, didn't you? The Latina asked annoyed "Fine, guess there's no point in trying to change the subject now… Are you about to start getting ready, baby?"

"My dear Vega, you of all people should know, I was _born_ ready."

"A little overconfident, aren't we?"

"I made sure everything and everyone was up to speed for tonight." She smirked "So, _yeah_ I feel pretty smug right now."

"Careful Jade, you wouldn't want to have problems walking through doors with that big head on your shoulders." Tori teased.

"Says the lady with the big ass."

The tanned brunette self-consciously puts her hands over her butt.

"I walked right into that one, didn't I?"

"Sure, did Tor." Jade grunted, getting up from her seat "Still, I get what you're saying, better safe than sorry, right?"

"Pretty much."

Wordlessly, the thespian walked to the front stage so she could see if her vision was coming to life, the Latina not too far behind.

* * *

Moving the curtains, they saw that everything was set, the chairs were in place, so was the food and drinks, among other things but most importantly, in front row there was a table were the impartial judges would see each performance and pick the winner of the first Friday the thirteen showcase.

 _"And I'll be damned if I don't win!"_

Just because Jade was the mastermind behind the evening to come, it didn't mean she wasn't about to deny everyone a fair chance to win, but of course she had her eyes on the prize.

 _"A perfect way to end a perfect day."_

Jade began to daydream how she would take Tori into her arms after she won the event and would ravish her till they both were unable to move.

But of course, her bubble popped when she saw Sinjin and Burf doing some sound work.

 ** _"HEY!"_**

Both teens jump in terror once they heard Jade's screech, to their mutual horror, she did not look pleased.

"What are you two doing?!"

"Um… Just checking the equipment?" Burf stuttered.

"Oh? Checking the equipment?" Jade mocked "Well that's nice, I have one question though… **_DIDN'T YOU TWO NITWITS CHEKED THE EQUIPMENT AN HOUR AGO?!"_**

"We… We did." Sinjin replied this time. "We just thought it's never a bad idea to give it a second look."

"For your sake, you **_better_** not screw this up." Jade narrowed her eyes dangerously "Because if even **_one_** thing goes wrong tonight… You'll wish your parents hard worn a condom when they were making you two! **_DO I MAKE MYSELF CLEAR?!"_**

"Ye-Yes!"

"Good!" She hissed. "Now turned on the damn lights! I want to see if they actually **_work!_** "

Sinjin pressed some buttons and some colorful lights from above the stage turned on.

"Vega, do me favor and grabbed the microphone and sing something for me."

"Like what?"

"I don't know… Surprise me."

Tori smiled before grabbing the microphone, singing the itsy-bitsy spider, which of course irritated her very scary girlfriend.

 ** _"NO!"_** Jade bellowed "Anything but that!"

"Let it Go…"

"You're walking on thin ice, **_Vega._** "

"I'm sure of it." Tori replied coyly "But you won't do anything to me."

"And what makes you so sure?"

"Because the show must go on, West!" She declared theatrically "And I'm sure you wouldn't want any bad luck to come my way, _especially_ when we all worked so hard to make your Friday night come to life."

"Ok, you got me there." Jade admitted grudgingly "You're safe _today_ , but _tomorrow_ you're in for it."

"We'll see." Tori said "Or maybe you'll be so grateful that you'll only kill me with hugs and kisses." After that, she gave Jade a peck on the cheek. "Consider this a sneak preview."

She swayed away, but not before turning around to give her girlfriend a wink.

The Goth smiled goofily at the little show she was getting, suspecting Tori moved the hips a little too noticeable as a way to tease her.

 _"I love Friday the 13th."_

She ran after the Latina, leaving the scared guys in the dust.

"You need a new pair of pants?"

"Oh yeah." Sinjin replied "You?"

"Yes."

"Come on, I have some in my locker."

"Why?"

"This isn't the first time I been scared in school grounds and it won't be the last."

"Just a little more than I wanted to know man."

* * *

 _Ping._

"Oh yay! New alert from The Slap!"

Jade walked behind her lover, wrapping her arms around her waist.

"What you got there?"

"I dunno yet … Something from The Slap." Tori answered. "Let's see… Friday the 13…. Best of the Worst Bad Luck."

"Oh, this looks ** _good_**." Jade smirked "I like the sound of that."

"Somehow I get the feeling this has something to do with you."

The thespian's evil smile was answer enough.

"Baby… What did you do?"

"Let's just say that after the show's over, you will be getting a special treat from me."

"That… Doesn't necessarily answers my question."

"You're not going to let this go, are you?"

"Is the sky blue?"

"Leave the witty remarks to me, Vega." Jade said, pressing her finger against the phone's screen. "All you have to do is enjoy the show."

"I have a bad feeling about this."

* * *

 _"Hey Cat…" Robbie greeted._

 _The redhead giggled "Hiiii!"_

 _"Noticed anything different about me?"_

 _Cat stared at him, up and down, up and down, up and down, not seeing anything different about her friend, that is until she realized someone was missing._

 _"Rex is gone!" She gasped._

 _"Yup and you'll be glad to know you won't be seeing him for a while."_

 ** _"YOU KILLED HIM?!"_** _She gasped horrified, gaining the attention of several students in the hallway._

 _"What?! No!" Robbie denied "Rex is back at home in my room."_

 _"So, you didn't even give him a burial?!" Cat cried **"YOU… YOU MONSTER!"**_

 _She ran away screaming, leaving a confused Robbie behind._

 _"What just happened?"_

 _"I'll tell you what you did!" A random shrugger said "You made Cat cry!"_

 _"How evil can you be?!"_

 _"What? Kicking a puppy isn't enough trill for you, you sick freak!"_

 _Robbie was surrounded by a bunch of several shruggers who didn't look very pleased, he knew right then and there that he was in for some serious pain._

 _"Wait… Wait… I can explain!"_

 ** _"GET HIM!"_**

 _Robbie let out a very girly scream and ran towards the nearest exit, an angry mob going after him._

 _"I was only trying to impress Cat!" He shouted **"Just wanted to show her how I matured! PLEASE DON'T HURT MEE! I WANT MY MOMMY!"**_

* * *

Tori paused the video, not willing to watch anymore.

Jade on the other hand was snickering trying to hold it in, which of course turned into loud laughter, something her girlfriend _clearly_ didn't found the tiniest bit funny.

"That explains why Cat had been avoiding him all day." Tori frowned "And I guess now I know why Robbie was hiding under your car crying for Rex to come back."

"This video is on the top three of my list!" Jade chortled "Wait till I show you the rest!"

 ** _"NO!"_** Tori snapped, putting the phone out of the other girl's reach "I will not watch some more videos of our friends getting humiliated in any way shape or form, its cruel and inhumane!"

"That's precisely the reason _why_ you should sit on my lap and watch these videos with me." Jade reasoned "Come on Vega today's Friday the 13th."

"Your point?"

"That everyone in school with the exception of us has been getting struck with a dose of bad luck all day and there has been no escape for these poor smucks, which is nothing short of hilarious!"

" ** _Hilarious_** isn't a word I would use!" Tori hissed "If anything, you are seriously bent."

"You should know that by now Vega, **_especially_** after three months dating me."

"Be that as it may, I'm still not watching!"

Tori walked away so she could get ready for her performance, since tonight was a very special evening… It was the first ever Hollywood Arts Friday the 13th showcase that her girlfriend somehow managed to pull together with some _convincing,_ the tanned girl didn't want to know the details of how _that_ happened, she was just glad Jade didn't go on a vengeful rampage had she been denied the chance the celebrate her _"favorite holiday"_ the way she always dreamed of.

 _"Performing on stage, surrounded by everyone else's bad luck… Go figure… That's Jade all right… So deviously cunning, twisted and frightening to anyone who isn't lucky enough to see the beautiful soft side of hers… And she's **all** mine." _

"Does that you wouldn't _want_ to watch how Beck got hit in his special area then?" The Goth said mischievously "Gotta say, it was _definitely_ the first time he _ever_ made me laugh, figured all it took was for him to get… _Unlucky_."

Tori's train of thoughts stopped right in its tracks, getting back to reality the moment her girlfriend spoke with a tone she knew all too well, she didn't date the school's resident psycho for months without learning to read in between the lines, this was nothing short of a challenge, she was telling her _"I'm not done with you yet."_

Which of course the Latina interpreted as something more _"She's fishing, Jade threw a hook at me and now she's waiting for me to bite it so she can reel me in... But she's not going to! ... I can outplay you **West**."_

"You see a clip of a guy getting hurt _down there_ , you seen them all."

"Oh really?" Jade asked. "Did I mention that a bicycle tire was involved?"

"How the **_chiz_** did that happen?"

 _"So much for outplaying Jade…"_ Tori kicked herself mentally _"I just took the bait, now it's only a matter of time till she reels me in… Well fine! Gimme your best shot!"_

"Wouldn't _you_ want to know?" The Goth grinned, teasingly getting her own phone out. "Just one click and all your questions will be answered… Come on Vega, you know you want to."

 ** _" NO! THAT'S WHERE YOU'RE WRONG! I DON'T WANT TO!"_** Tori yells frustrated because deep down she _did_ want to see the video "It's wrong! Beck's your ex-boyfriend!"

"So?"

"And you guys agreed to try and be friends!"

"So?"

"And he's still my friend!"

"So?"

"And… And… It's **_wrong!_** "

"You said that already."

"Well it is!"

"And yet, you're still here." Jade pointed out. "If you really didn't want to see the clip then you would've left already… _Interesting_ , don't you think?"

 _"Damn you and your logic, West."_ Tori thought irritated. _"That's it! I'm out of here, she can't push my buttons if there are no buttons for her to push!"_

Once more, she made her way towards the door.

 _Unfortunately, her girlfriend, took out a different bait._

"You know…" Jade said airily "He once told me when we were dating and in confidence that your pink lemonade sucked."

 ** _"HE DID WHAT?!"_** Tori exploded. "That jerk! You know what? I **_will_** see that video!"

The thespian chuckled victoriously as Tori made her way so she could sit on her girlfriend's lap and they could see Beck getting the short end of the stick.

 _Jade had successfully reeled Tori in, not that the Latina cared._

"Sinjin… Sinjin…" Beck said warily. "Slow down! Hey! Don't come over here… I told you not to… **_AIEEEEE! MY BALLS!"_**

"That…" Tori winced. "Had to hurt a lot more than I can even imagine."

"Ah Vega, you never fail to surprise me with your incredible grasp for the obvious!" Jade said mockingly "But you have to admit, Beck's _new voice_ made the video a lot more… _Satisfying_ to watch."

Both girls stared at each other before they started laughing uncontrollably, eventually they got tired of that, so they decided to use their free time wisely before the showcase.

"Want to go to the Janitor's closet?"

"Need you ask Vega?"

It was surprising how fast they could run in heels.

 _"Best, I never tell Tor, what I think of her pink lemonade."_

* * *

Later that evening everyone was waiting for their turn to perform, currently Jade was the first one on stage doing a one woman show of her play **_"Clowns don't bounce."_**

"And so, if you're a clown planning to do a dangerous stunt to entertain children, always remember to check your parachute before you drop from a plane otherwise, _this_ will happen to you."

She made a hand signal, which Cat and Robbie saw from above, they tried to lift the clown dummy which was too much of an effort for them.

"Work! Work you fools!" Rex sneered "I'm not about to get turned into furniture because you two can't do one little task right!"

"See, Cat." Robbie grunted "I told you Rex was alive."

"Couldn't you have left him at home?" The redhead whined "He's always mean to me!"

"But that's what I… Oh forget it, let's just drop the dummy before Jade screams at us again."

"By dummy, I assume you, _right_?"

 ** _"REX!"_**

After much effort they managed to throw the clown dummy from the catwalk, both of them saw as it felled, hitting the floor and once it made contact it exploded sending blood in all possible directions, which of course included the judges and the students in the front row.

"Wow Cat, I'm impressed." Robbie praised "That fake blood you got from your brother seems awfully real."

"Fake blood?"

* * *

"The End!" Jade shouts to the stunned crowd. "Thank you and good night!"

As she walked backstage, the judges wrote something down before Lane got up from his seat to say "We'll be taking a fifteen-minute break before we continue."

"Yeah so we can wash away… Whatever this gunk is." Sikowitz agreed.

"I think its paint." Sam Puckett lied, getting some of the blood out of her clothes. "Why the hell did I agree to be a judge for this thing?"

"The pizza has arrived!"

 _"Oh, right… Free food."_

* * *

The Thespian entered the backstage, feeling smug and victorious at her performance she gave, as an added bonus, the splattered fake blood sure was a nice touch to the stage.

"I say the night is up to a promising start." Jade grinned "Hey Harris, whose up next?!"

Andre looked at the list "Let's see, Robbie's next, then Beck… Followed by Cat… Myself… Some shruggers then Sinjin then Trina… Wait… **_TRINA?!_** " He shouted surprised "You let her be on the show?"

"Only because Vega begged me to." She admitted "That untalented pest Tori calls a sister wasn't shutting up until she got her way!"

"And she got it, didn't she?"

" ** _HEY!_** Who is telling the story here?!"

"You are!" Andre squeaked.

"Damn right I am! Now as I was saying before I was rudely interrupted." Jade hissed "We came to an understanding, I'd allow Trina to be a part of the showcase _if_ she shut her trap for a month!"

"And she agreed?"

"Believe me Harris, it took a lot of restraint on my part to **_not_** break her neck at all the stupid demands she was making." She snarled. "But in the end, it was for the sake of Tori's sanity more than anyone else's."

The musician smirked knowingly.

 ** _"What?!"_**

"Oh nothing." He shrugged "Tori softened you up."

Jade narrowed her eyes ominously, not liking what he was implying.

"Erm." Andre cleared his throat "What's Tori getting out of this deal?"

"Aside of a whole month without her sister's annoying voice and terrible singing?" She retorted "That's not of your damn business!"

He saw his friend's cheeks turning red, that was enough to tell him that it really was none of his business.

"So, uh … Care to tell me why you put _your girlfriend_ at the bottom of the list?"

"She asked." Jade shrugged "I originally wanted her to go after yours truly but you know how Vega is, she thought the more time she had to rehearse her act, the better."

"Sounds like Tori all right."

"But between you and me, Harris? I think she's just anxious, not that she has any reason to be, nevertheless I agreed to let her be the last act of the night."

"Very considerate of you."

"Look, bottom line here?" Jade said "I _know_ my girlfriend, and in the end of it all, if it puts her mind at ease and gives an amazing performance because of it then it's a win-win, now where the hell is Shapiro?!"

"I'm here! I'm here!" Robbie panted, trying to catch his breath. "I was just trying to make sure Cat wouldn't cry."

"Cry?" Jade parroted "Why would she cry?"

Before he could reply, the redhead came running holding a mushroom casserole. "Hiii!" She greeted happily.

"Shapiro! Get out there and do your act with your puppet or whatever!" Jade ordered "And you better break a leg! **_Understand?!_** "

" ** _YES! YES!_** I promise Jade!" Robbie sputtered fearfully, running away from the Goth, Rex in hand.

"Good luck Robbie!" Cat waved cluelessly.

"Lil' Red!" Andre exclaimed "You **_never_** tell anyone good luck before going on stage!"

"Why not?"

"Because it's bad luck!" He explained "It's best if you tell him to break a leg."

"That's mean!" She cried out horrified "I don't want Robbie to break anything!"

Knowing their redheaded friend wasn't going to get the concept of superstitions, Jade decided to change the subject.

"Cat." The Goth asked slowly "What you got there?"

"I made some homemade cream mushroom soup!" She replied cheerfully. "I been taking a cooking class and I just wanted to try something new and voila! Soup for my bestest friends!" Her smile turned to a frown. "But no one but Tori has taken a bowl from my casserole."

"Well… That's likely because we already ate before the show." Andre said soothingly. "Nothing personal."

"What's that supposed mean?!"

"Nothing!" Andre raised his hands in surrender. "I just meant that we all knew that performing with an empty stomach would end badly so we all ate at our houses."

"Ohhhhhh!" Cat said understanding "Ok then! Guess I'll save this for Tori, she really seemed to like it!"

 ** _"GET OFF THE STAGE!"_**

 ** _"YOU SUCK!"_**

 ** _"LOSER!"_**

They all heard that Robbie wasn't getting a warm reception to say the least which became more obvious as everyone heard him screaming and weeping in pain, moments later he entered looking a little worse for wear.

"Oh Robbie!" The petite redhead cried worriedly "What happened to you?!"

"I got attacked by vegetables!" He bellowed in despair **_"IT WAS HORRIBLE!"_**

"The best part was when your parents went with the crowd and started throwing tomatoes at you." Rex snickered "Lucky for me, I escaped the vegetable rain."

Robbie limped away from his friends muttering under his breath "This day has been the worst, what else could go wrong?"

"Break a leg Robbie!" Cat said obliviously, trying to be helpful. "Did I say it right?"

"Too little too late, Lil' Red."

* * *

Meanwhile the Vega sisters were sitting in the practice room, the older brunette was putting as much make up as possible to try and hide her pimple, which in her eyes seemed to have grown, nevertheless she wasn't about to go out and have people point at her unwelcomed addition to her otherwise beautiful face.

"What you think Sis?" Trina asked "Can't see the pimple now, can you?"

Her sister remained quiet, just staring back, she was so eerily still, that it was beginning to unnerve the older Vega "Tori? Quit staring at me like that, its making me uncomfortable!"

But she didn't stop staring, if anything the younger teen began to get close, _very close;_ violating Trina's personal space, this of course made her move in the next available seat to try and put some distance between them.

Tori didn't like that so she jumped towards her sister, holding Trina in her arms so she wouldn't escape.

"Aw, somebody needs a hug!"

"You been doing the Funny Nugget show with Cat again, haven't you?"

"Caaaaaaat?" Tori asked as if it was a foreign word. "I know nothing of this Cat you speak of mighty nugget queen!"

"Queen?" Trina pondered. "Ohh, now that's a title I can get used to, but the nugget part? So not me! Tori are you feeling all right?"

Her sister remained still, quietly staring once more, after several uncomfortable minutes, she finally spoke, saying something that made Trina's blood turn cold.

"I see you…. I see you… I see you… There's a thing on top of you mister and it wants to eat you head!" Tori shouts and begins to attack Trina with a magazine **_"BAD! BAD! BAD! YOU STAY OFF THE COUCH!"_**

 **"AH!"** Trina screamed trying to avoid getting hit in the head by the rolled-up magazine "Tori! Stop hitting me!"

Somberly, Robbie entered the room, surprised by what he was seeing.

"Looks like Tori finally snapped!" Rex laughed "About damn time too, crazy Tori is sexy!"

 ** _"REX!"_** Robbie hissed "Don't say that! I don't want Jade to hear and kill us both!"

Any remark the puppet was going to say was cut short by Trina who ran madly past him, yelling at Robbie to "Look out after my sister! I need to get some help!"

"That big spider was no match for me!" Tori proclaimed proudly, sitting back on the couch. **_"REX!_** Come in! Come in! I'm glad to see you!"

"You… You are?" The puppet asked mystified, gazing at Robbie who gazed back at his wooden companion.

"I have a bad feeling about this."

* * *

Meanwhile Beck was getting ready, the teen was next and was clearing his throat before going on stage.

"At least I'm talking normal again." Beck muttered "The last thing I need is to get laughed at."

 ** _"Ok Oliver! Your turn!"_**

"You don't have to shout Jade!" He groaned, rubbing his ear "I'm right next to you!"

"Don't care!" She snapped "Just go out there and break a leg! Preferably for real!"

"That was mean, Jade!" Cat cried out.

"Tough! I'm a mean person!"

"Not with Tori!"

"She's the exception to that rule."

Trina made her way towards her sister's friends who stared at her similarly to the way her sibling had done earlier.

"Quit doing that!" Trina whined "I had enough staring for one day!"

"What the hell happened to you?!"

"My sister attacked me!" The older girl bellowed "I don't _how_ and I don't _why_ but I **_suspect_** this has something to do with **_you_** , Wicked Witch West!"

"Oh really?"

" ** _YES!_** Really!" Trina hissed "What sort of weird voodoo magic did you use on my sister?"

"None that I can recall." Jade joked. "But I suggest you think twice about blaming me with whatever Tori did, for all we know you finally got on her nerves, which to be fair, I thought that would have happened long ago."

" ** _HA!_** Show how much you know!" She snapped "I been nothing but the best big sister I can possibly be."

Everyone stared at her as if she was high.

"Uh-huh…. Sure." Jade said sarcastically "And I have a unicorn on my garage."

 ** _"YOU DO?!"_** Cat asked excitedly "Can I go see it?!"

 ** _"NO!"_**

"Aww."

"I'm telling you! Something _is_ wrong with my sister!" Trina said desperately "If you don't believe me, then go and take a look! She was staring at me like she didn't know who I was, then she began murmuring things that made no sense, not to mention she claimed something was about to eat my head!"

That caught the Goth's attention.

 _"Vega has to be sick."_ She thought. _"There's no way she could say that sort of stuff, she doesn't have the creativity for horror…"_ She sighs. "As much as I hate to admit it, Trina may be telling the truth."

"So, what do we do?" Andre asked concerned.

"We go and find out what is up with Tori." Jade ordered "Hopefully its nothing too serious."

"And if it's is?" Cat wondered.

"Then I'll take her home, I don't want her to have a nervous meltdown where everyone can see."

As if it was his cue, Beck ended his performance, getting a standing ovation from the girls in the audience. "Thank you… you been a great audience… Thank you…" He finally entered the backstage "Phew… You heard that? The crown went wild."

When no one congratulated him, Beck took notice of how tense the mood had become. "What's going on?"

Before anyone else could say anything, Jade ran towards the practice room, the only thing in her mind was her girlfriend's health.

"Wait! Jadey!" The redhead exclaimed "I wanna help!"

"Lil' Red! Wait!" Andre grabbed her arm before she could leave "It's your turn!"

"But I wanna help Jadey!"

"I could go next!" Trina suggested connivingly. "That way you get to help out both Jade and my sister."

"That's a good idea!" Cat agreed quickly "Thanks! I'm sure you'll do great!"

Everyone highly doubted that, nevertheless they were in no position to argue seeing as they had more pressing matters at hand, so they all went after the Goth, leaving the older teen to have her turn ahead of schedule, something the diva was quite ecstatic about.

 _"It's my time to shine!"_

The moment she was on stage everyone gaped.

"holy Moley! Look at the size of that **_Zit!_** "

* * *

Following Jade into the practice room, the gang could see their tanned friend. She was facing a chair, on which sat Rex. The girl was standing in the center of the room, ominously glaring as she held Rex and appeared to be having a conversation with him.

"No. Rex, you need to listen. You've depended on Robbie for far too long."

There was a strange silence as Tori appeared to be listening to him and nodding. Only no one else could hear the conversation.

"Yes, I know, But here's the thing, you're real. Robbie is not! He's a puppet. How many times do I need to tell you? You need to live your own life."

"Tori, Baby? Are you ok?" Said Jade cautiously as she approached her girlfriend.

Turning, towards the group, Tori quickly grinned. "Oh, hi guys. I'm fine, in fact I was just talking with Rex here."

"Rex? Asked Beck dubiously. "Talking?"

Jade glared at Robbie, demanding an explanation, all he had to say was a fearful "I don't know."

There was another pause as Tori once again seemed to be listening to Rex, but the change in her expression appeared to indicate she disagreed with him.

"No More Rex! I need to show you once and for all. **_ROBBIE IS JUST A PUPPET, HE'S NOT A REAL BOY AND I'M GOING TO PROVE IT."_** Tori quickly moved towards the ventriloquist, but at the same time, gestured towards Rex. "The poor guy is deluded, He still thinks that Robbie is a real boy."

"What?" was all that Robbie got out before Tori rammed her knee straight into his nuts.

For a split second, everyone in the room gaped in shock, except for Tori who looked strangely pleased with herself.

Unsurprisingly the one who took her actions the hardest was Robbie, who stood frozen there for a few seconds, before letting out a high-pitched squeak, tipping over onto the ground in what undoubtedly was unmeasurable soreness, yet another incident that made this day a never-ending torment for the guy.

"Come on, don't you see! He didn't even react! And do you know _why?_ Because he has **_nothing_** down there! **_THAT'S PROOF_** **_HE'S NOT REAL!_** " Tori snarled "If he _was_ then he'd be in monumental pain! I ask you! Does _that_ look like pain to you?! **_HUH? HUH? HUH?_** "

"Kind of…." The Goth snickered.

"You're not helping Jade."

"Who asked you Oliver?!"

Before the stunned group could react, Tori glared at Rex on a chair and quickly moved towards Robbie.

"You need _more_ convincing?!" Tori sneered " _Fine_ , hope you like being proven wrong!"

"I'm real." Protested Robbie. **_"I'M IN PAIN! THAT ENOUGH EVIDENCE FOR YOU! PLEASE! NO MORE!"_**

Ignoring Robbie's cries, Tori reached over, grabbing his arm and pulled on it with all her might, as if she was trying to pull it off. "See Rex, his arm comes right off." Instantly the ventriloquist shrieked in distress which slowly increased to sheer agony. She pulled again and again but much to her apparent frustration, the arm did not, come off.

"Tori stop!" Andre bellowed as he quickly rushed to Robbie's side to try and save him from further harm but he was stopped by the Latina who gave him a penetrating glare.

 ** _"Don't!"_** She snarled "This is for Rex's own good!"

Through it all, Robbie's shrieking grew with every passing second, Beck was confusion, wondering what was going on with his friend, Jade on the other hand simply kept laughing while Cat and Andre, just stood there in bewilderment trying to grasp the situation.

Turning her attention to Rex again, Tori shouted. " ** _WHAT?!_** You **_still_** don't believe me?! Ok then, I'm done playing games! Looks like I'll have to resolve to more… drastic measures."

Again, moving quickly, Tori ran, grabbed the scissors from Jade's boot and with near insane grin, charged the nerdy teen. "Don't worry Robbie, I'm just going to cut you open to prove to Rex once and for all that you're just a puppet."

Only then did Jade snap out her amused state and tackled Tori just before she was about to cut their poor friend open.

Robbie seeing his near disembowelment, tried to make it out of the room only to collapse on the floor from sheer pain "Somebody… Call… A… Doctor… Please."

Jade got up from the floor as well as helping Tori to her feet, she didn't know what was going on but she needed to _think_ , so she sat down and sighed, she had just saved Robbie from what could otherwise be described as a horrible way to go, however no sooner had Jade sat down that Tori turned to give her a glare that was full of fury.

 ** _"HOW DARE YOU?!"_**

"What?"

 ** _"YOU KNOW WHAT!"_**

"No, I _really_ don't."

"Oh, don't play dumb with me West! I see you and that chair! I see it touching your butt with its furry tentacles. Only **_I_** can touch you like that."

Before Jade could object, Tori pushed the thespian off the chair and began to scream at the piece of furniture. **_"SHE'S MINE. I DON'T WANT TO SEE YOU TOUCHING MY JADE AGAIN OR YOU'RE DEAD!"_**

To make her point, Tori tossed the chair across the room where it landed by the window. For a moment she looked satisfied, but suddenly she said. "Oh, you went there! She did not like you better than me!"

With that Tori ran to the window, pushed it open and swiftly grabbed the chair and threw it out where it landed on the street.

 ** _"AND STAY OUT!"_**

Tori then turned to Cat who was standing nearby. "and you, I don't care if your hair Is on fire, **_STOP HOGGING ALL THE BUTTERFLIES!_** You've eaten so many, their coming out of your ass!"

With a look of sheer terror, Cat screamed, "Their coming out of my butt, OH my god, I have to get to the bathroom! **_HELP MEE!"_**

 ** _"DON'T MOVE!"_** Jade bellowed. "Can't I don't know what's going on but I have an inkling this has something to do with you, gimme your casserole, **_NOW!_** "

The redhead complied fearfully.

"Cat, these mushrooms look weird. Where on earth did you get them?" The Goth questioned as she stirred her bowl of soup.

"Umm, let me see if I remember."

It was a few moments later, just as Jade put the first spoonful in her mouth, did Cat answer.

"Oh yeah! See Jadey, I couldn't find any in the pantry, so I used the ones in the bag in my brother's dresser drawer."

Almost instantly, Jade knocked the bowl of soup onto the floor and at the same time spit out the soup directly into the face of Beck, who was unfortunate enough to be standing so close to her.

 ** _"WHAT?!"_**

Looking at the bowl of soup on the floor, Cat quickly frowned. "It couldn't be that bad. I made it with love!"

After wiping the soup from his face, Beck put himself between both girls. "Cat, did you really get these mushrooms from a bag in your brother's dresser drawer?"

"Yes. He eats them all the time, so they can't be the poisonous."

"No, they're just the magic ones." Quipped Andre with a grin.

Cat's face promptly lit up. "Are they… Are they really magic?"

Sidestepping Beck, Jade grabbed Cat by the shirt. "No Dum Dum! They aren't magic. They're hallucinogenic mushrooms. Do you know what I almost ate?"

Cat simply stared at her friend, completely lost. "What's that's supposed to mean?"

"It means, I'm going to clobber you!" Jade growled, raising her fist to do good on her word.

Before she could, Beck grabbed her arm. "Calm down Jade! She didn't mean it, I'm sure."

Backing off, Jade continued to growl. "I bet she didn't."

"I don't get it." Cat scratched her head confused "What's wrong with the mushrooms?"

Andre, put his arm around her. "Think of them as Weed, only in mushroom form. And a lot stronger."

 ** _"OH!"_** Turning to her friend, Cat quickly apologized. "I'm sorry Jade. "

"Do you know, what would have happened, if I had eaten that. Or worse if you had given it to **_before_** I performed! How in the hell could I have done my monologue when I was tripping and not look like a total idiot?"

Andre picked up the bowl off the floor and set it next to the blue container that Cat had originally brought the soup in. "Did anyone else eat this?"

A chorus of No's was his reply.

Lifting the lid and looking inside, Andre frowned. "How come it looks half empty?"

"Oh, I told you guys, Tori had some a little while ago."

 ** _"SHE DID WHAT?!"_**

"See Jade after she came by earlier to see you, she missed lunch due to some errands she was running and was really hungry. She must have eaten two or three bowls full." Then with a measure of pride, Cat continued. "She really liked it."

This time, it took both Andre and Beck to restrain Jade, who immediately went for Cat's throat.

 ** _"LET ME AT HER!"_** She raged madly **_"I'M GOING TO KILL HER!"_**

As Beck and Andre continued to hold Jade back, Cat screamed in terror, running in circles in search of the only person who would protect her from her friend's wrath.

 ** _"TORI! DON'T LET JADE KILL MEEE!"_**

Robbie wondered aloud, still on the floor and in pain. "Um…. Where is Tori, anyway."

Everyone stopped what they were doing, Jade's blood turned cold ** _"NO ONE WAS WATCHING HER?!"_**

 ** _"AHHH!"_**

"Looks like didn't go far." Andre said concerned "Sounds as if it came from the next room."

Jade, worried about her girlfriend, broke free of the guys and rushed out the door, followed by the rest of the gang.

 ** _"VEGA!"_** Jade bellowed worriedly "What happened?... Are you ok?!"

The Latina stared at her girlfriend for a few seconds, slowly backing away from her with each step Jade took.

"Stand back!" Tori commanded "You're not a werewolf, you're just a demon in disguise You're not fooling me again. I'm onto you. Though I did love you in, Killing Daddy."

Jade, not having any idea what Tori was babbling about, counted backwards from ten, trying and _failing_ to calm herself before her urge to _murder_ Cat resurfaced yet again.

Andre wanting to prevent any further shenanigans, cautiously approached Tori. "Calm down. It's ok… We're your friends."

Looking over at the musician, Tori promptly squealed with delight. "Oh my god, It's Al Green, I love all your songs. I'm so tired of being alone is so great."

"Any idea what she's talking about?"

Immediately backing away, Tori sneered at Beck. "Don't **_YOU_** get near me! I see the babies on your fingers, you touch me, the crawl in my ears and I get pregnant. And no touching Jade! **_SHE'S MINE!"_**

A look of pure revulsion quickly formed on Tori's face, stepping away from Beck as far as she could. "Ugh…. I knew it! Once your fake face melted off, I can see what you are now. ** _YOU'RE AN ALIEN INSECT!"_** Oh my god, you're hideous!"

Running over to Jade, Tori still held her girlfriend's scissors. Before the Goth could even react, she pushed Jade behind her and held the scissors menacingly. "I'll protect you Jade! That creep won't be laying his eggs in you. They lay hundreds of them and they eat their way out of the host when they hatch. I've seen it on the national geographic channel."

"Eeeep!" Squealed Cat as she recoiled on horror, away from Beck.

Realizing the situation was getting out of control, Jade gently took the scissors from Tori. "It's ok, Baby. Evil insect Beck won't hurt us." Then with a sarcastic tone, she added. "Not to mention, he's probably just fall asleep, five seconds after laying his eggs anyway."

Looking somewhat insulted, Beck retorted. "Seriously Jade, it was just once!"

"Quiet Insect Boy!"

And just when the group didn't think the night couldn't get any weirder… They were proven wrong.

 ** _"WHAT'S THE MEANING OF THIS JADE!"_** Tori bellowed madly, grabbing her girlfriend's arm roughly, expecting an answer **_"WELL?!"_**

"That's my arm Vega."

 ** _"I KNOW THAT!"_** Tori snarled "Explain the tattoo Jade! **_THE TATTOO!"_**

"What tattoo?"

"The one that says **_J &B FOREVER!_**" She screamed "Last I checked my name doesn't start with a **_B_**!"

"The hell you're talking about Vega?" Jade snapped "I don't have any tattoo there!"

 ** _"LIAR! I CAN SEE IT! WHY JADE?! WHY?!"_**

Thinking quickly, Jade tried to say something to calm down her hysterical girlfriend girlfriend. "Vega… The tattoo… It was a mistake, the guy put it an B instead of a ** _V_** for Victoria… You know… The **_V_** that your name starts with?"

"Really?"

"Really."

"Its still a terrible tattoo!" Tori proclaimed "I'm going to erase it!"

The Half-Latina started to bite on Jade's arm as if that would magically erase something that _wasn't_ there.

While Jade enjoyed the _soothing_ pain, her girlfriend was giving her, she knew that now was not the time for such a thing, so she turned Tori towards the wall in an attempt to distract her. "Baby, why don't you look at the wall for a while."

Tori quickly nodded. "Sure, but can I play with your hand boobs later. They're really big!"

"Uhh, sure. Just look at the wall for now!"

Satisfied, Tori turned to the plain wall as if it was the most interesting thing in the world and began to touch it. "Oooooooooh….."

"Holy crap! She's totally wasted!" Laughed Andre, trying and hoping to ease things up after the awkward scene they witnessed.

 ** _"IT'S NOT FUNNY HARRIS!"_**

"Oh, so you can laugh at Robbie's ** _tremendous_** pain, while Tori's pulling his arm off, but I'm not allowed to be amused by this?"

" ** _NO!_** Only **_I_** can laugh at her pain and misfortune!"

"That's not very nice Jadey."

But the Goth didn't hear her, she was more concerned with what Tori had _unintentionally_ revealed, not just moments ago but also earlier when this whole fiasco started, when she threw the chair out the window, then when she _"protected"_ her from Insect Beck, and now with the tattoo only _Tori_ could see.

It all started to make sense in a twisted sort of way.

 _"She's afraid."_ Jade thought in understanding. _"Vega's afraid I'll leave her... That I'll go back to… Him."_

"Hey! Where did Tori go?!" Andre asked, breaking the pale girl's train of thoughts.

Much to everyone's chagrin, the Latina disappeared once more and she took _something_ with her this time.

"Uh… Jade?" Beck asked tentatively.

 ** _"WHAT?!"_**

"Under the light… I can see your… shirt… _Differently_."

 ** _"SO?!"_**

"So, we can all see a little _more_ than usual."

Jade raised an eyebrow before looking down, to her horror, Beck was _right_ , her nipples while still under her clothes could be **_seen._**

 ** _"What in the flying fuck?!"_** Jade snarled _"Where did my…. **Vega** … I don't know how, but I know she's the one who stole my bra!"_

Without another word, she covered herself with a jacket to avoid getting any unwanted the attention from _any_ prying eyes.

 _"I'll admit, she pulled quite a trick on me."_ Jade muttered grudgingly, _"It's sneakier than the time I put a shrimp in her bra."_

She knew however that when this was all over, they were going to have a serious talk, but _first_ they had to find her girlfriend before she ended up hurting herself.

* * *

As the night continued Tori was becoming more elusive, which of course pissed off her girlfriend more and more, especially after she found her bra of what little remained of it after going through a blender.

 _"Where in the hell did Vega **get** a blender in the first place?!"_

For the 20th, time that night Jade had managed to keep Tori under control but each time the girl could only be calm even _less_ than before, since it became harder and harder to find her when her friends had to go and take their turns to do their respective acts.

But for now, the Latina's attention was on the wall, which according to Tori had tap dancing spiders on it, when unexpectedly Sinjin came in.

While everyone else looked to see what the curly haired weirdo wanted, Tori looked and saw something quite different.

In her rather spaced out state, she could see Agent Smith from the Matrix, as played by Hugo Weaving, complete with sunglasses. Only to Tori, instead of the normal Agent smith suite, he was wearing the dress made of Sandals that Hugo Weaving had worn in the movie "Priscilla, Queen of the desert."

As the current delusion played out in Tori's mind she could see Agent Smith turn his head and say with a distinct menacing tone. "Miss Vega! So good to see you."

Moving quickly, and before anyone else could even react, Tori made a way cry springing into action.

With lighting speed, Tori ran towards Sinjin, suddenly jumping up and leaped up off the wall, exactly like Carrie Ann Moss did in the Lobby scene in the matrix.

Leaping up off the wall Tori, flipped upside down and somehow in absolutely pure Matrix fashion, managed to Kick Sinjin square in the head. Then she landed on her feet ant followed up and much as Neo had done in the very beginning of that scene, hit the 2nd agent, which was actually Burf who came in behind Sinjin, square in the chest sending him flying backwards into the wall.

For a moment, time seemed to stand still as Jade and the rest of her friends realized just what Tori had done. Burf was now lying in the corner, apparently knocked senseless and oddly Sinjin just stood there.

"Owww." He mumbled right before falling face forward onto the floor.

Already stunned by Tori's feat, they were even more amazed because they knew that Tori didn't know Karate or Judo. Yet in seconds, Tori had managed to take out both of them quite easily.

"Shit! The smiths are multiplying" Tori yells in despair as she ran up and then moved to punch Robbie in the face. Unlike last time, Robbie managed to duck and before Tori could attack again, Jade stopped her.

"Baby." Jade said, barely able to contain her laughter. "You got all the agents. Good girl."

"Are they **_OK_**?" Asked Andre as Beck began to survey the unconscious teens.

"I think they're just stunned."

"How the hell are we going explain this?!" Jade hissed "There's no way I'm going to let Vega get expelled because **_someone_** didn't check her damn ingredients!"

"I said I was sorry!" Cat cried "You don't have to be so mean to me!"

Thinking quickly, Beck grabbed big gulp soda, which now was mostly just melted ice and poured it on the floor. "I just spilled my soda and before I could warn they walked in the room, then both slipped, fell and knocked themselves silly."

"Impressive." Jade admitted.

"What's going on here?!"

The group turned around and to their collective horror, they came face to face with their principal Helen who was suspiciously staring at the teens.

"Well?" She snapped "Anyone wants to tell me why those two are on the floor covered in soda?"

"They slipped and felled!" Tori answered with a giggle which was cut short by Jade's hand covering her mouth.

"You have something else to say to me young lady?" Helen asked Tori, the Half-Latina nodded enthusiastically.

"You!" She ordered "Get your hand off her mouth! Now!"

Reluctantly Jade did as she was told and lifted her face from her girlfriend's mouth, everyone else was just as terrified as the Goth, dreading what their friend was about to say.

"Can I have an autograph?"

Of all the things Tori could have said while high, that wasn't even on the list.

"Really?" Helen asked overwhelmed with giddiness "It's been so long since someone asked me for an autograph! Sure child! Who do I make it out to?"

"Lola Martinez!" Tori exclaimed.

Jade slapped her own forehead in annoyance "Go figure."

"Here you go Lola!" Helen said happily, giving Tori her autograph. "Hold on to that, someday it might be worth something."

"Thank you, Georgia!"

"Ah and you even remember the character I used to play!" Helen said fondly pinching Tori's cheeks. "Are these your real cheeks by the way?"

"Yes, they are!" Jade answered this time "Sorry principal but it's almost her turn to perform on stage and we got to get going!"

Before Helen could say anything else, Jade grabbed Tori by the arm and ran like hell, their friends going after them.

After they were as far away from their principal as possible the gang let out a sigh of relief.

"That was close." Andre said.

"Yeah no shit Sherlock!" Jade snapped "I don't even want to know what the fuck was going through Vega's head back there but I'll be glad when it's all over!"

But of course, the Goth wasn't getting her wish any time soon since Tori walks up to Jade holding out an imaginary pencil and note pad. "You're Liz Gilies, oh my god, I'm your biggest fan, can I have your autograph. I never miss an episode of Dynasty. Though I liked that other show you were on better, you know the one where you play that girl at that performing art school. You know it's odd, I can't think of your character's name."

Looking quite confused, Jade said. "Ummm...I don't know who Liz Gillies is, but my name Jade."

 ** _"THAT'S IT!"_** Suddenly screeched Tori at the top of her lungs. "That was your character's name. Jade! I loved that character so much, I cried when they canceled your show after four seasons. Can I please have your autograph."

"What do you mean I got canceled after four seasons?"

"Jade, just give her the autograph!" Said Beck from a few feet away. "Best we keep her happy otherwise who knows what else she might do."

With a grunt Jade snatched the imaginary book and got ready to sign with the equally imaginary pen. "Fine Tori, who do I make it out to?"

Tori shook her head with a somewhat bewildered expression. "Why did you call me Tori? My name is Lola Martinez!" Tori then shot Jade a seductive smile. "You know if I wasn't dating Chase behind Zoey's back, I'd totally go for you. Do you go to Pacific Coast Academy?"

Looking more annoyed by the second, Jade signed the imaginary autograph book. "If Chase turns out to be anyone other than a figment of your stoned imagination, we're going to have a long talk about this!"

"Can I have an autograph too!" Squealed Cat as she ran up with an equally imaginary autograph book.

Jade handed the imaginary book back to Tori and growled, "Here you go and you had better hope Chase doesn't exist."

Turning to the redhead, Jade quickly gave her a cold stare. "And as for you, when this night is over, I'm going to kill you!"

Cat took a step back, hiding behind Tori.

 ** _"DON'T GET NEAR HER!"_**

 ** _"EEP!"_** Cat squealed, hiding behind Beck this time.

"Well, at least thing can't get any worse right?" Robbie asked rhetorically.

"Next up!" Sikowitz said "Tori Vega!"

"Everyone! Grab her!" Jade ordered "I don't want Tori out of my sight!"

"Uhh…" Cat said "Jadey? She's gone!"

"How the fuck does she keep doing that Batman disappearing act!" The thespian bellowed before hitting Robbie in his broken arm… Hard.

 ** _"OW!"_** He cried out "What did I do?!"

"You opened your mouth!" She hissed before mockingly saying "At least thing can't get any worse… Idiot! She could be anywhere by now!"

 ** _"HELLO HOLLYWOOD ARTS!"_** Tori greeted at the top of her lungs ** _. "I'M HUNGRY! HOW ABOUT YOU?!"_**

"Oh, for fuck's sake!" Jade groaned "Our luck **_can't_** be this bad!"

* * *

The group ran towards the stage and to their shock Tori was there, smiling happily without a care in the world.

"Shit on a stick." Jade cursed before glaring at Cat "I fucking **_hate_** you so much right now."

"Oh, I can't watch." Robbie whined, closing his eyes being unable to move his arms at the moment.

Tori grinned widely at the crowd who stared impatiently, seeing what the Half-Latina was going to pull, most of the student body expected her to sing since that was her main talent, instead they were caught by surprise when the tanned teenager began screaming, yelling words in Spanish and running in circles.

"Oh, dear lord… Vega…" Jade was horrified "When this is all over I swear to you I will make anyone who gives you a hard time after this feel my **_wrath_** and I will personally make sure Cat is buried alive!"

"You all may think I'm crazy!" Tori yells out at the audience "And you may be right! But who among us is truly the crazy one? You for not believing the truth or me who is trying to show you what is real?! Huh? Huh? Huh?"

The judges were writing something down.

"I mean come on!" She continued "Gimme a Bunny rabbit and I'll make it hop! Its normal right? But what if the bunny rabbit wants to crush you! Not so cute anymore am I right? Not that it could but if it was huge like a whale what are the chances it would want to cuddle with you? **_ZERO!"_**

 _"Oh God!"_

And another thing!" Tori bellowed "See my hand? Well do you? Well now you don't!"

Tori was ready to strike her own hand with Jade's scissors to the combined terror of the audience only for her to stop inches from her palm.

Jade nearly fainted. "I got to remember to take those things away from her."

"Scared you, didn't I?" Tori asked. "That's good… It shows empathy and what would be all be without empathy? Would we even be here? I don't think so… And another thing why… **_AHHH! MARTIAN HOT DOGS ARE RAINING FROM THE SKY! TAKE COVER!"_**

Tori jumped under the chair to take shelter from the imaginary assault. "If I don't make it! Tell my sweet, sweet Kathy I loved her!"

"Who the hell is Kathy?!" Jade raged.

After several minutes of Tori pretending to be under fire, she got up from under the table. "Phew! That was a close one! After surviving falling hot dogs, it's good to sit back, relax and enjoy the gift of life and what better way to do that than by exploding! Anyone has a soda?"

Someone in the audience threw her a can, which Tori catches without a problem.

"Thank you!" She said "And now… Oh no! Oh no! No no no no no! The can is in Spanish. Now I'll never know what it says! But wait… I do! I know Spanish It's as easy as riding a bike… If I knew how to ride one!"

The audience actually let out a laugh, much to the confusion of Jade and her friends.

"It says here that to go to the moon all you need is a kite!" Tori squeals "I have a kite!"

Tori runs in circles for a few seconds before finally sitting on the floor, she squeals as she lays the imaginary kite on the floor and does some quick work on it, she lifts the imaginary kite for all to see and jumped off stage giggling insanely as she makes a quick run towards the judges "And now I'm going to fly to the moon in a rocket of flaming cheese! I like cheese!"

She ran towards the stage again, making a little dance that mystified everyone, Jade of course was having one heart attack after another, unable to see anymore, she ran towards the stage, ready to save Tori from making a further fool of herself.

Tori made a jumped and as if it was almost planned she landed onto Jade's waiting arms "Oh lookie here! My knightness is shining armor has arrived! Want to take me away from the dragon?"

"I'm going to stab the red dragon." Jade hissed.

"I'm sleepy." Tori yawned before closing her eyes, her head resting on her girlfriend's shoulder."

 ** _"OK EVERYONE!"_** Jade boomed "Shows over! Get out of my sight!"

She then ran as far as possible with Tori in her arms, glaring at anyone who even dared to say anything about her girlfriend's "act."

Once she reached the group she was exhausted "Lets het Vega out of here."

Suddenly, Jade heard something she never expected after what just happened.

Applause.

"That was incredible!"

"Superb!"

"Original!"

"It was so random you never knew what she was going to say next!"

Praise after praise being directed at Tori was all Jade heard but couldn't understand.

Sikowitz approached his students. "I have to agree! Never in my life have I come across anything like this! It was the most brilliant piece of experimental theater I've ever seen and my fellow judges agree.

"Indeed." Lane said.

"Sure, whatever." Sam shrugs.

"And so, it's my honor to give the award for best performance on the first ever Friday the 13th Showcase to Tori Vega!"

The crowd cheered.

Tori, who was unaware of what was going on simply nuzzled in the crook of her girlfriend's neck.

"Make sure she receives it when she wakes up." Sikowitz gives Jade the award. "And don't leave her side, I'm sure Toro will be more than happy to see you after her _all too happy_ performance."

"Unbelievable!" Jade hissed "I work my ass off to do my clown don't bounce play and my stoned girlfriend gets the award!"

"True…" Andre said wearily "But at least the night's over."

Jade grunted and walked away with her girlfriend and the award she received.

 _"I fucking **HATE** Friday the 13th!"_

* * *

The next morning Tori woke up.

"Ugh…" Could someone turn off the lights?"

"Hard to do." Jade said evenly "Considering that's the sun and we kinda need it to live and shit."

Tori opened her eyes "Jade?"

"Yeah that's me, Vega."

"Where are we?"

"Your house."

"Why are we here." Tori asked confused "Shouldn't we be at school ready to do the showcase?"

"That was yesterday Vega."

"Yesterd…. Wait… It's Saturday?!"

"Pretty much."

"But… How… I don't even remember… How did I…. Is that a trophy?!

"Yup."

"Oh my god baby, you won?!" Tori asked "I'm so proud of you!"

"No Vega, I didn't win… You did."

"Wait… What? How? I don't even remember being on stage."

"Then let me refresh your memory." Jade said, getting her phone out so her girlfriend could see the performance she made last night, unfortunately someone in the audience had taped the whole thing and uploaded it to The Slap.

As Tori watched the video, her mouth fell open in sheer horror. "Oh my god… Is that me?! What was I doing?! I'll never be able to show my face at Hollywood Arts again. I'm ruined."

"Hardly." Jade said trying to hold her jealousy "I worked on my 10-minute play for three weeks perfecting it, practicing it, so it would be fucking perfect. I was determined to win. But **_NOOOO_**... You run on stage, tripped out on magic mushrooms, spoke whatever came to your stoned mind and people thought you were being spontaneous and give you a standing ovation!"

"What? You're joking!"

"Nope, read the reviews, Vega."

Tori grabbed her girlfriend's phone and began to read. "One special note of the various performances put on last night was the bizarre performance done by Tori Vega. A monologue I can only describe as the most brilliant piece of experimental theater I've ever seen. From the music to the girl in the audience who caught her and held her with such protective passion, it was simply brilliant. The rest of the audience, judging by the five-minute standing ovation, obviously agreed."

"I was a hit?" Tori couldn't believe it. "Wait… Who was the girl who caught me? Please tell me it was you!"

"Of course, it was me!" Jade hissed "Vega, you have no idea how terrified it was seeing you up there, I was worried that whatever was going to come out of that mouth of yours could have led to something much worse, it took a lot out of me to not lose you out of my sight yesterday but you keep pulling a Houdini on me! You even ** _stole_** my bra! and the worst part? You could have gotten hurt!"

"Wait… I stole your bra?"

 ** _"THAT'S WHAT YOU HEAR OUT OF EVERYTHING ELSE I SAID?!"_**

"I heard everything Jade!... it's just… That caught be by surprise… This whole thing did." Tori lowered her head "It must have been a difficult night for you… I'm sorry."

"Not your fault." She grunted "It was Cat's."

"Cat's?" The Latina asked "How was this her fault?"

 ** _"SHE COOKED THE DAMN MUSHROOMS!"_** Jade screeched "I was just about ready to **_kill_** her right there on the spot and I still might!"

Tori puts her hand over her girlfriend's "Thank you."

"For still thinking of murdering Cat?"

 ** _"NO!"_** Tori yells "For keeping me safe, that must have been hard, especially since I was out of my mind."

"Don't mention it." Jade shrugs "It's part of the girlfriend job."

The Latina got up from her bed and grabbed the trophy. "I believe this belongs to you."

"The hell you're talking about Vega!" She asked confused "You **_earned_** that thing."

"I was **_high!_** It doesn't count!" Tori retorted. "If I _had_ been in my right mind and done my _actual_ performance, thing would have turned out very different and you know it! You could've won!"

"Correction, I could've had a _**chance**_ at winning." Jade retorted. "Don't sell yourself out short Tor, whatever you had planned on doing? I'm sure it would've been nothing short of _adorkable_."

"Aww baby, that's so sweet of you."

"If you tell **_anyone_ **I said that, I'll deny it till hell freezes over." She warned ominously "And another thing **_Vega_** , I'm not sweet!"

"Sure, you're not." Tori chuckled. "Still, seeing as Cat _technically_ help me **_cheat_** , the trophy isn't mine to keep … So, Jade… I want you have it… Maybe next year I'll win it for real."

The thespian glanced at the award, it was undoubtedly a sight to behold but truthfully it held little significance to her now,

"Tell you what Vega… What if we share it?"

"Share it?... Are... Are you sure?

"I wouldn't had offered if I wasn't."

Tori once more puts the trophy where she last saw it, resting her head on her girlfriend's shoulder.

Without another word, Jade wrapped her arm around her girlfriend's waist. "Vega… _Tori_ … Beck… He's the _past_ … You're my present… **_My future_** … Don't ever forget that."

"I love you Jade."

"The feeling is mutual."

Then, they shared a kiss for several minutes, it wasn't a very long one but still filled with so much tenderness and love it made the previous night more than worth it.

"Tor… Can you do something for me?"

"Anything."

"I need you to answer a question and I need you to think **_hard_**."

"Sure thing baby."

"Does the name _Chase_ mean anything to you?"

* * *

 ** _And… END! Phew! This story took ages for me to write but it was certainly worth it, it was extra challenging for trying to have it ready on this date too but I somehow managed, I think I deserve a break and a pat on the back, no? LOL... I'm so tired._**

 ** _I want to thank "Quitting Time" for giving me the idea in the first place as well as brainstorming with me to make this project a reality._**

 ** _Safe to say that Cat isn't going to be welcome in Jade's house for a very long time or allowed near Tori for that matter._**

 ** _Robbie getting hurt was no different than in the show in some respects, in my headcanon, he has gone through several Friday the 13th and almost always ends up in pain and is the only day of the year where Jade is willingly close to Robbie because she likes seeing people getting bad luck, only this time she had other more important things to do than to amuse herself and undoubtedly, this is one Friday she won't soon forget and Tori is more than grateful that she has no recollection of the stuff she put her friends through._**

 ** _Sikowitz implied he knew Tori wasn't herself, I think we all know how is that possible, am I right?_**

 ** _There are some references I'm sure you all noticed but I'll point out the most obvious ones, the line "_** ** _"I have a bad feeling about this" which was used several times in the fic is a homage to "Star wars."_**

 ** _Also, those who of you who liked "High Tori" I actually used my experience writing for GIR from my "Invader Zim" fics to come up for some crazy shenanigans for Tori since I wrote for her as if I was writing for GIR, even made some references to the insane S.I.R Unit when Tori was doing her "act" see if you can spot them, heh._**

 ** _Yeah, I also made several cheap references to more of Liz Gillies and Victoria Justice's work, how could I not?_**

 ** _Constructive Criticism as always is greatly accepted._**

 ** _Invader Johnny Signing Off._**


End file.
